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World News
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Sunday, 20 March 2011 15:48 |
 Gaddafi is said to be a closet fan of 'Friday' Members of the United Nations Security Council have gathered in New York to review an emergency draft resolution put forth by Britain and the United States calling for the use of Rebecca Black's hit song Friday as part of offensive measures against Libya.
The resolution is said to include provisions for thousands of
loud-speakers to be set up around Tripoli, in an effort to flush out
pro-Gaddafi forces. All rebel fighters will be provided with free
noise-blocking headphones, to avoid contact with the toxic music.
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Australian News
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Saturday, 29 January 2011 00:00 |
 Party-goer Billy Mareerro circa 2004 Not satisfied with being rushed to Royal Prince Alfred Hospital during 2010 New Years Eve festivities, self-described party animal Billy Mareerro has already declared his 2011 New Years Resolution - to get "drunker, and more smashed (sic) than ever".
"Alot of people make resolutions like 'I want to lose weight' or 'I'll exercise more'. That's absolute crap, why not set a realistic goal?
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Australian News
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Written by Shaun Dyno-Mite
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Sunday, 26 December 2010 00:00 |
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EXCLUSIVE: The Federal Government's self-proclaimed tough stance on asylum seekers appears to be in tatters, as reports emerge of an armada of boats heading directly towards Hobart. Hundreds of refugees are said to be on-board the illegal vessels, mostly comprised of middle-aged upper class men seeking asylum from the failings of the NSW Government. |
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Australian News
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Sunday, 14 November 2010 16:50 |
 Witness accounts describe the man as unusually well-dressed Staff working at retail giant Portmans were left in shock today after a man, shopping with his girlfriend, actually understood how female fashion and styling works. The retail giant has released nationwide memos calling for the immediate removal of lounge chairs from stores, usually reserved for bored partners and husbands, in what they are heralding as 'a new age of male consciousness'.
"He seemed to have a grasp of colour-matching and value for money, it was bizarre" one staff member told WPN. "Normally guys stand around either bored or puzzled, not understanding why short-shorts are stylish, but three-quarter pants are not.
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Australian News
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Saturday, 13 November 2010 23:36 |
 The first politican to wear a flag since 1944 Former One Nation leader Pauline Hanson has released an explosive interview in which she reveals that the majority of overseas nations are actually full of non-white residents. Having recently returned from a six-month fact-finding trip across Europe, Ms Hanson found that many countries not only housed and accommodated for a variety of racial groups, but actually coexisted quite peacefully.
"I couldn't believe it. France was absolutely full of French people, Germany full of Germans. Has the whole world gone mad?
"And did you know the UK isn't actually full of white people? |
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 "Bookmark WPN")
Deliberately Ambiguous
